People, places, possessions—in that order (week 14)

I could probably write a book about all the lessons I’ve learned this past year. In fact, I might very well go ahead and do so when we get home. (Assuming we ever go home!) But the one that is on my heart today has to do with priorities in life. And so…

As long as we are together: For the past 10 days, the core four Broullires have been enjoying the heck out of Hilton Head Island. It is a magical, captivating place of unparalleled beauty. We bike absolutely everywhere—to the beach, to church, to the grocery store. And as I’m pedaling along the bike paths lined by palmettos and live oaks, pausing at lagoons to search for turtles and alligators, I can’t keep an ear-to-ear grin off my face. So much love for South Carolina!

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This Friday, Zac and Tammy drove down from Beaufort after work to spend the weekend with us. As it typically does when we get together, the conversation turned to future gatherings. The newlyweds are trying to plan out their summer travel schedule (tricky, as they both have to ask for leave from their jobs as Marines). Also Tammy, who grew up near Seattle, expressed an interest in going back there with us and showing us her favorite sights. We also talked about an Alaskan cruise, our condo week in Eagle River, a return trip to Folly Beach.

It occurred to me halfway through this conversation that while all of those destinations sound fantastic, I would be perfectly happy sitting in a one-room cabin in Siberia, if it meant I got to spend time with my family. The world is a vast and majestic place, with far-reaching corners I can only hope to one day explore. But when Tony and I have all four of our children together around a table or under the same roof, it doesn’t matter what city, what state or even what continent we’re on. My people will always come before places—any place at all. (And then, there’s possessions… I think I’ve already written about that to death! A recap, if you want…)

But this place is pretty cool. After Zac and Tammy left on Sunday, the four of us biked to Mass and then onward to play 18 holes at the most beautiful minigolf course any of us have ever seen. When we finished, we were famished. So we made our way to The Sandbar—one of the restaurants our townhouse hosts recommended. We ordered liberally from the menu (bacon-wrapped scallops, seafood pasta, loaded hush puppies) thinking that we’d bring home the leftovers. But lo and behold, we ate every. Single. Bite! Can’t stop thinking about the pasta sauce. Bella literally slurped some up through a straw.

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Monday was a return to work and school, but we did finish in time to soak up a few rays on the beach. Tony caught a stingray (not my favorite) and Bella ran soccer drills through a maze of washed-up jellyfish. As we were biking home, a pod of dolphins (yes, that’s the real name) came through and put on quite a show of flips and splashes. Amazing!

As we’ve gone along this journey, Tony and I have made it a priority to reserve some adults-only time for ourselves and our marriage. The girls love these date nights because they get rid of the parents for a few hours. Even though I can’t stop thinking about the food at The Sandbar, neither one of us wanted to go sit in a restaurant again. Instead, we packed a picnic and Tony found a park in Shelter Cove where we could play cribbage and watch the sunset. Apparently it is a popular and romantic spot—we witnessed yet another marriage proposal!

Gone fishin’ This morning, Zac took a day of leave and drove back here so that he and his dad and sisters could go on their private fishing charter. I almost tagged along, just to see Tony in all his glory—fishing the day away with his kids. But the idea of an empty house and a day to myself was just too tempting. Now that they’re gone, of course the house is too quiet and I don’t quite know what to do with myself. Maybe I’ll take my bike and a book to the beach and look for some answers there 😉

Transparency: Last thing—I have to be honest. Though we might very well be in paradise, this week has not been all peaceful and perfection. We’ve been forced to have some hard conversations between ourselves and with the girls about their wishes to go home sooner rather than later. The thought that my daughters don’t want to continue this adventure as long as physically possible has me feeling gutted, to be honest. What are they going to do at home? How can sitting in De Pere, which we hear is still very much under quarantine, be more desirable than sitting at the beach in the sunshine? Or checking out a new place? It’s been the trip of a lifetime, no? No—I guess not. Not for the girls.

In a moment of frustration, I asked God for clarity in this matter. Within minutes, an answer floated through my brain: “This was your dream.” It’s been hard for me to admit, but going on this adventure was something that Tony and I were going to do with our family, whether the girls liked it or not. For the most part, they’ve been troopers and kept their complaints to a minimum. But I know it has been hard on them to be away from their friends and stuck for so many months with us. (People over places—I guess that can be reversed when you just want to see your friends but you are forced to be with your parents 24-7!)

So in just under two weeks, the girls will fly back to the Midwest without us. Thanks to the generosity of their grandparents, they’ll make it back to De Pere in time for Bella to try out for her high school soccer team. Tony and I will drive the van home… in all honesty, I don’t know when we’ll arrive. Another key lesson I’ve learned on this trip is that sometimes, it’s okay not to make a plan. Sometimes it’s okay to just sit and enjoy the moment, and let the future wait to work itself out. So while my instinct is to be looking on Google Maps and start planning our route and booking hotels, I’m going to instead log off my computer and go enjoy the sunshine!

Sending love and warmth to all of you back home. May the beautiful spring weather lift your spirits and warm your souls!